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Week Seventeen
Published 05.14.2008 | Permanent Link | Comments (16)
Your Baby:
- Is about five inches long from head to rump, which is the EXACT height of the jar of salsa I am currently quadruple dipping into. Bowls are for suckers.
- Has begun to develop the all-important adipose tissue -- more affectionately known as baby fat.
- Is hard at working transforming its skeleton from soft cartilage into solid bone. Get this baby a part on Heroes.
You:
- Possibly feel immensely huge and very pregnant, but your bump probably isn't as noticeable as you think it is. People may hesitate to comment or miss it completely, like the woman last night who came up and handed me an alcoholic cocktail and seemed genuinely shocked when I politely refused it, despite the fact that I feel like my belly eclipses my shoes at this point.
- "Normal" weight gain at this point can be anything between five and 13 pounds, although y'all know how I feel about the word "normal." One book I read this week advised any woman who has gained more than 13 pounds to see a nutritionist and "be more careful", while my doctor COMPLIMENTED me last Wednesday on not managing to gain a single blessed pound yet. I want to stab the world in the eyeballs with a fork right now, a little bit.
Ah, the double-edged sword of baby movement. On the one hand, it's been a downright fabulous week, what with the regular sensations and acrobatics I'm feeling in my uterus. There really is nothing like it in the world -- both wonderful and WEIRD because my lands, there's a teeny little moving person living inside your body. Biology! Whatever will it think of next.
On the other hand, I've just replaced one neurosis with another. Whereas before I would worry that without regular every-other-day-or-so heartbeat checks, my child would simply cease to exist and I would never know. You might think that I would chill out a little once I could feel the baby move, but now I just work myself into a state if I can go an hour without feeling a kick or tickle. It's all a very efficient system, I think.
We made our first baby purchases this weekend -- I waffle wildly between feeling extremely well-prepared thanks to everything we held on to from Noah's babyhood and feeling OH MY GOD WE STILL NEED SO MUCH DARN CRAP. We don't, really, and neither do you, but without a baby shower or registry to look forward to I figured it was high time we got to the store for some onesies and burp rags already.
If this is your first pregnancy, it's probably a little early to start your registry, although it certainly can't hurt to think about what store you'll use (TIP! choose one that offers online registry management and ordering, but also has an actual local store for easier exchanges and hands-on inspections of the bazillion-and-one options) and to start getting advice from friends and online about product recommendations and reviews. Don't worry, I will have SO MUCH TO SAY about registries and baby gear in the coming weeks, as registry assvice remains my biggest weakness.
(I have a very hard time keeping my mouth shut at baby stores whenever I see a pregnant woman contemplating something either useless or totally fabulous, and I'm always vaguely disappointed that no one just comes up and asks me to help them register. Don't I look knowledgeable and experienced? Don't you want my knowledge and experience? Wait, where are you going? Oh hi, store security, I was just...oh, okay. I understand. You've warned me about this before. I'm leaving.)
Oh Yeah, THIS: My couch sure is comfy. I just wish I could get up off of it without all the ungraceful grunting.
New This Time Around: Why am I still dry-heaving after meals? Why does the mere sight of any type of meat make me gaggingly ill? Why am I still a slave to an ever-changing menu of One Acceptable Food of Mystery while All Else Remains Vile and Inedible?
Last time I lost 10 pounds in the first trimester but quickly gained it back in the early weeks of the second once my appetite returned to normal. I didn't lose any weight this time, but man, there is just no sign of ANYTHING returning to "normal" anytime soon, digestively speaking. I see cans of Ensure in my future, I just know it.
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About this column
Zero to Forty is a week-by-week guide to the miracle of pregnancy and all the various indignities that come with it. New installments will be published on Wednesdays, with other pregnancy-related content and ramblings to be published whenever the columnist can stay awake long enough to type themzzzzzz.
The column is well-researched but not written by a health care professional. Consider it your internet BFF pregnancy guide. See our legal disclaimer below.
About the author
Amy Corbett Storch, aka Amalah, is a freelance writer and professional blogger from Washington, DC. She is currently knocked up with her second child, due in October. Her first child is still currently wearing diapers. Amy is currently wondering what she has gotten herself into now.
Amy also writes Alpha Mom's Advice Smackdown.
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The Zero to Forty masthead and illustrations were created by the artist Brenda Ponnay aka Secret Agent Josephine. Brenda is very talented and these images are copyright-protected. You should hire her!
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Comments (16):
psumommy said:
Mmmm. Salsa.
Posted on May 14, 2008 11:25
Bekki said:
I'm a few weeks behind you (12, as of this weekend) with my first. and holy hell, if I didn't live on the other side of the country, you could totally do my registry. It scares and befuddles me.
Maybe you could just do it online :) I'm going to need the help!
Posted on May 14, 2008 11:44
Claire said:
You can definitely come register with me! I'm overwhelmed by the "starter list" at Babies R Us. Our apartment is 1000 square feet. With that starter list, we'll have to move out all of our furniture just to fit the baby! So tell me, what do I definitely need? Maybe need? Will never need?
Posted on May 14, 2008 12:11
Wallydraigle said:
An HOUR? Until a couple days ago, I went most of the day without feeling her move (which, yeah, always made me nervous); there was always a flurry of activity around 1 pm and 11 pm. Now (19.5 weeks) it's all day, all the time, and she's thumping at me hard enough that I can feel it with my hand. Her favorite thing to do is to wiggle into weird positions that tickle me and make me laugh hysterically. I cannot wait for the bus ride to work today.
Posted on May 14, 2008 12:56
Wallydraigle said:
Also. I would totally welcome some advice on what to buy/register for. Otherwise I'm going to march into Target in a month, my brain will short out, and I'll register for the whole freaking store.
Posted on May 14, 2008 12:58
Whozat said:
I just hit 12 weeks, as well, and if we're not careful, we are going to register for every cute little outfit with a puppy-dog on it (thanks to my partner) - and no equipment!
Posted on May 14, 2008 14:16
obabe said:
I think a bonus post of "registry musts and must nots" should be forthcoming!!
Posted on May 14, 2008 17:18
Ida said:
Okay, it's my second also and I am 16 weeks and still totally doing the dry heave thing. Why is that??? I did not do that at all with my first. My first is also a boy. Maybe these are little girls we're carrying around with us?!?!
Posted on May 14, 2008 20:12
hydrogeek said:
The stuff! Bring on the advice about STUFF! Most especially, a good double stroller. Also, pass the salsa.
Hydrogeek
(Pregnant with second baby, one week behind you.)
Posted on May 15, 2008 10:54
lulu said:
hmm..question. I am an Aussie girl living in Japan, also 12 weeks along with my first..doctors here are REALLY strict about weight gain.
I was told between 8-10kg MAX! Does that seem realistic???
Posted on May 15, 2008 22:16
Wallydraigle said:
lulu: I'm pretty sure that's insane. I know "every book I've read" isn't necessarily right, but I think 25-35 lbs (uh... 11.34 to 15.88 kg is what Google tells me that is) is what pretty much every recently-written book I've read says. My doctor concurs. I guess it's not a HUGE difference, but it still seems a little low.
When I first read your comment, my American eyes just read "8-10 lbs" and I almost had a heart attack.
Posted on May 16, 2008 13:45
lulu said:
thankyou Wallydraigle,
I`ve been comparing friends info from Australia (on their 3rd pregnancy and 1st) and it doesn`t seem as strict.
I`ve also noticed that the birth weights are quite low compared to `home`. THe average here is 2.5kg~2.8kg!
I think it has more to do with post-natal recovery, as in most of the weight gained dissapears within the first 2 weeks if kept within that 8-10kg limit..
But what to do if you actually want to EAT??!
Posted on May 16, 2008 22:40
Jaeme said:
About the dry heaves...I had horrible queasiness and occasional puking from 6-14 weeks when I was pregnant with my son. After that the round-the-clock queasiness was gone, only to be replaced with a slightly grosser, though infinitely more manageable, daily habit. I dry heaved and threw up once every morning for the rest of my pregnancy. I learned quickly to not eat breakfast, not apply makeup and most importantly not attempt to drive my car until the morning's retching was over. It took throwing up orange juice, a face looking like I got into a brawl with an angry, oily mechanic, and throwing up all over my stick shift while trying to simultaneously drive through an intersection and throw up to learn to just wait. Wait to get ready for work, wait to eat, wait to do anything that couldn't hold on while my stomach violently contracted its contents each morning.
It went on for so long that I began to think it had nothing to do with my pregnancy, and this was just what my body would need to do every morning for THE REST OF MY LIFE. And then one day I gave birth and I haven't had my face in the toilet bowl since.
Was that too gross?
Posted on May 17, 2008 09:30
RJStewart said:
Amalah- I'm 14 weeks with my first, and I live in the DC area, so can you please please please do my registry and take me shopping and tell me what to buy? ;-) There are TOO MANY things out there, and my house is soon to be under renovation for several months, and right now I'm just hoping for good hand-me-downs from family because it's overwhelming, and do these little creatures really need all this STUFF anyhow? I'll buy you Chipotle burritos....
Posted on May 19, 2008 10:14
Ashlee said:
This site is nice! I am currently 17 weeks pregnant & i have been checking back here every week and I love the candid baby talk. it is refreshing for the days that I am just overwhelmed. I get a good laugh. Thanks!
Posted on May 27, 2008 11:25
tara said:
i'm pregnant with my second and i do the same thing at babies r us! once, i went up to a random couple who looked completely overwhelmed to offer my expert baby registry experience and ended up sending her an e-mail with a 3-4 page detailed list i created for some of my friends of baby items you "need". looking back, i have no idea if she found it helpful or just plain weird.
also, where is my second trimester this time around? i'm already getting uncomfortably big yet i'm still having food issues?
Posted on May 27, 2008 16:42