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Week Thirty-Eight
Published 10.08.2008 | Permanent Link | Comments (3)
Your Baby:
- Is officially a little chunkin, at well over six pounds and 19 1/2 inches long.
- Is also officially considered "full term." In other words, he or she is STRAIGHT UP FREELOADING from here on out.
- Is practicing making fists and fetal breathing in anticipation of life outside the womb.
You:
- Have probably had enough of this magical special time, thank you very much.
- Backaches, joint aches, heartburn, indigestion, constipation, Braxton-Hicks contractions, painful kicks, bladder pressure, stretch marks, itchy skin, swollen ankles, fatigue, dry mouth, mood swings, did I miss anything else in this cavalcade of late-pregnancy hilarity?
- Are alternating between crazy excitement about finally meeting your baby and crazy panic about oh my God, you're finally going to meet your baby and they're going to expect that you take it home and like, keep it alive and stuff.
This week we turned our bedroom into a photography studio. I only have a handful of "real" photographs from my pregnancies (beyond the disembodied self-portraits of my belly that I've taken every week), and I was determined to remedy this. Not determined enough, apparently, to remember to find and book an actual maternity portrait session with an actual maternity photographer, but surprisingly, I'm really happy with the results.
We draped a couple sheets over our bed and tacked them up on the wall (with Scotch tape, for we are Classy), covered two cheap clamp lights (available at any hardware or art supply store) with tissue paper and attached them to the ceiling fan, set up the camera and the tripod and ta da! Do-it-yourself maternity portraits.
Now, I HATE having my picture taken. I HATE IT. But I also hate not having any decent photos of myself. So I agreed to suck it up and go along with my husband's posing instructions, despite feeling like a giant, squishy, stretch-marked whale. We looked online at what the professionals do (HUSBAND, WHILE GOOGLING: Please God, don't let a ton of porn show up.) for ideas, and then sort of improvised based on our half-assed set-up and photography abilities. I wore a bra and some stretch pants, then even got brave enough to shed my clothes (tastefully, I swear), and we used the camera's timer to let my husband get in a few shots.
Crappy color was fixed by switching to black-and-white or sepia afterwards, and my admittedly rudimentary Photoshop skills were enough to fix any other complaints (namely, armpit boob, what the hell?). I'm still annoyed that I didn't have my act together enough to book a "real" photo session, but if money is tight or you're really shy about the idea of getting maternity photos taken, I encourage you to try your own session at home. Once my husband showed me a couple of the photos he'd taken, I went from that squashy beached whale feeling to a wonderful feeling of...well, this is corny as hell but true...BEAUTY. Look at what my body is DOING! Look at the curves and the bump and the BABY! Only a couple of them are anything I'd consider framing or showing people, but I think they're all beautiful and I'm so happy I'll have them to remember this pregnancy by.
The whole night ended up being a really great little celebration of the baby and the last days of pregnancy. We were taking my photo but it was really about him, and after we put the camera away we came to an immediate and easy agreement about his name -- which was a freaking MIRACLE, believe me.
In addition to maternity photography, there are other ways you can celebrate and preserve the Final Days of the Belly. A couple other ideas:
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About this column
Zero to Forty is a week-by-week guide to the miracle of pregnancy and all the various indignities that come with it. New installments will be published on Wednesdays, with other pregnancy-related content and ramblings to be published whenever the columnist can stay awake long enough to type themzzzzzz.
The column is well-researched but not written by a health care professional. Consider it your internet BFF pregnancy guide. See our legal disclaimer below.
About the author
Amy Corbett Storch, aka Amalah, is a freelance writer and professional blogger from Washington, DC. She is currently knocked up with her second child, due in October. Her first child is still currently wearing diapers. Amy is currently wondering what she has gotten herself into now.
Amy also writes Alpha Mom's Advice Smackdown.
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The Zero to Forty masthead and illustrations were created by the artist Brenda Ponnay aka Secret Agent Josephine. Brenda is very talented and these images are copyright-protected. You should hire her!
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This column is only for entertainment purposes and is not written by a health care professional. Any recommendations or information provided herein should not be used as a substitute for advice by a trained professional. For a full statement of our site policies, please click here.
Comments (3):
WabiSabiLife said:
I am on the same timetable as Amalah (I'm 38w, and some days). Last night was my last photography session *while* pregnant. I've done 11 so far. I found someone at the local Community College (a real adult, not an 18y.o.) who is a photography major and he has been doing an independant study project of me. I approached him last March, actually, because I wanted free photos, but it's worked out for both of us. We'll probably do some more after The Dude is here.
Posted on October 8, 2008 08:26
Tiffiny said:
Well, I too am 38 weeks. And, I too, do not have any photos of my belly. Wait, I have one set taken about half way through. I keep wanting to book a session, but it's sooo stinkin expensive. I guess I should do something though, cuse soon this baby will be out and my belly will go back to being just fat. I'd like to remember what it was like while being full of another human. I basically just want proof of this whole experience.
Posted on October 12, 2008 13:38
charlotte said:
Hon, you forgot the swollen HANDS. As in, being unable to bend fingers in the morning, or use an opposable thumb all day without major tooth gnashing (as in http://theatricalmilestones.blogspot.com/2008/10/beauty-of-opposable-thumbs.html)
Anyway, that photoshoot, oh yes, I'd like to do it. But man, if I could only find a maternity photographer here in this sad little town who doesn't get squicked out by, you know, teh belleh ...
Posted on October 15, 2008 16:43